I've even raped and killed a mountain panda in the hills of Shaanxi.

Dear Interweb,

If I were to start running again on Seattle sidewalks, what shoes would you recommend?

Thanks,
Laural

PS Today I learned that it is funny to read about Jesus jerking off a whale.

Ron Jeremy is so popular because straight guys watching his porn can always be certain they are only being turned on by the women.