argh

[lauralh]

why can't people just be rational and logical in their love lives? or at least honest. this is not a movie, this is real life dammit.

there are at least two relationship lies that I don't believe:

one: I'm just not ready for a serious relationship right now.

this either means "... with you." or "I want to fuck around some more" or both.

two: I don't really see myself falling in love with you, because there's not the "spark".

riiiight. because you can totally 100% predict the future. well, gee, if you aren't open to it, then wow, maybe it won't happen. this is just one of those things that annoys me because it shows the person saying it is a romantic. Like, ok, you can't fall in love with someone because they are too fat or too stupid or too ugly or too annoying, that's fine.

another "favorite" is "I don't want to ruin our friendship". this basically means "I don't find you sexually attractive."

how about you guys?

Comments

[herbaliser.livejournal.com]

That being said, my experience is that its synonymous with what you're saying in the long run. Sooner or later people get past whatever "not ready" feeling they have and decide they are willing to give things a go again, and I don't think I've ever seen a case where it was with the person who was informed of the not ready feeling.

Yeah this is basically my point.

[llarian.livejournal.com]

I see your point, but its still a valid call to make.

I've been in a several "might have been" relationships that played through as I described above, but I don't think I would have wanted to run the risk of one or both parties being hurt because one of them wasn't able to make that sort of commitment. Diving into an intimate relationship when you're not capable of on destroys relationships.

(Oh, and I need to correct my statement above a little bit. I HAVE seen people get back together after one party told the other that they weren't ready. But that's very much the exception, not the rule from what I've observed. I wish I were still in contact with that particular couple, I'm curious as to whether it amounted to anything.)