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lauralhThere's a non-interesting story as to why I'm subscribed to David DeAngelo's Double Your Dating mailing list, but I have unsubscribed today.
Mainly because this one was actually good.
I ordered your ebook and it's great, but i have a question that i couldn't find the answer to in there. This girl and I were getting really close. Everybody thought we were going to "hook up" soon. Then, some jerk hooked up with her. I still tried to get together with her even when they were going out. I know this guy was a jerk and i kept telling her that. Two years later, he dumps her and tells her that he cheated on her over 15 times. He also said that she "was just a rug for
him to walk on". She's completely done with him now, but there is still a problem....me and her still aren't together. I have a feeling that she kinda likes me, but we don't spend much time together. We faded from each other's lives a few months ago and I don't know how to get back into her life. While I think she might have some small feelings for me, she is probly going to be cautious because I've been waiting for her for two years. She's busy working a lot and I don't know how to get close to her. It's way to early to ask her on a date. How can i get close to her if she is being cautious (besides being funny of course, because i automatically do that)?
And also, every time a girl finds out that I'm a wrestler and I and do martial arts, they think that it automatically makes me "not their type". What do I say to that?
>>>MY COMMENTS:
To answer your second question first, just STOP TALKING ABOUT being a wrestler and martial artist.
This reminds me of the construction worker who goes to the doctor and says "Doc, every time I hit my finger with the hammer it really hurts. What should I do?".
STOP IT. Duh.
OK, now let's talk about your INTERESTING question.
Well you asked for it.
Your question was "How can I get close to her if she is being cautious...?".
Based on what you've told me in your email here, I'd say that maybe you should use your wrestling
and martial arts skills to BEAT HER UP a little.
Dude, what are you TALKING ABOUT?
lol...
By the way, I'm joking about beating her up. I don't usually tell people that I'm joking about things, but in this case you sound so dense that I have to.
Before I give you any more public verbal abuse, let me tell you something...
I'm doing this for your own good. You need it.
Back to the verbal abuse...
There is something that you're OBVIOUSLY not seeing here.
It's right in front of your face, but you're missing it.
In fact, there are TWO very important issues that we need to deal with.
Let's talk about the MOST OBVIOUS one first.
YOU'RE IN LOVE WITH DAMAGED GOODS... AND YOU CAN'T SEE IT.
Unfortunately, this is the GOOD news.
The BAD news is that you must have some major issues if this is the kind of woman that interests you.
As you can probably tell already, this isn't the kind of thing that I usually discuss in my newsletters... but I feel that this
particular discussion is going to help a lot of guys... so here goes.
I know, I know...
You're a "good guy".
You want to rescue her from the jerk, and show her how well you can treat her.
You think that if you could just have the chance to TELL HER how you FEEL ABOUT HER that she'd see the light, and come running to your arms... and you'd be able to give her everything she's always wanted in a man.
You want to be the one that leads her to understand that she DESERVES BETTER, and she can have it if she chooses you.
I feel ya, dog.
By the way, the only reason I know this particular situation so well is that I've LIVED IT a few too many times.
It's ironic, but you're actually LUCKY that this particular girl isn't interested in you.
You have no idea how much grief she's saving you by not being interested.
OK, back to the point...
Let's talk.
Just you and me.
Like friends.
WHAT ARE YOU THINKING, MAN?
It's always amazing to me how a guy will pass up a dozen opportunities a day to walk over and meet attractive women... but they'll spend days, weeks, months, or even YEARS trying to get the attention of a woman who isn't interested or
isn't WORTH it.
It's great being human, isn't it?
So why is this?
Why do us guys do this to ourselves?
What's up?
I mean, maybe this girl reminds you of your mom.
I don't think I want to go there.
Whatever it is, you really need to wake up and smell reality.
The last thing you want is a woman who is an ABUSE MAGNET.
I don't care what you say, or how nice you think she is... the reality of this situation is that you're hung up on a girl who needs more help than you can offer her.
And again, the WORST part of this situation is that you don't realize what this whole situation is saying about YOU.
You're basically admitting that you are:
1) Attracted to the wrong kinds of women.
2) Blind.
3) Obsessive.
(By the way, so am I, so don't feel too bad.)
So, what can a guy DO about a situation like this one?
Well, here are a few ideas:
1) Forget this particular girl. She's probably not interested in you to begin with, and even if she was, she's likely to break your heart and dump you for an abusive jerk (again) anyways.
2) Take a look at yourself, and figure out what you REALLY want. If you want abuse, neglect, and pain, hire a dominatrix. Less heartache.
3) Stop being so damn NICE. There's an incredible lesson here, but you're not seeing it. Guess why this girl chose the jerk over you? Hint: It was NOT because he was chasing her around and obsessing over her. It was because she felt ATTRACTION for him. He triggered something inside of her that is MORE POWERFUL than REASON. You need to learn how to do THAT, my man.
(and then he goes off in his whole spiel about attracting women, blah blah blah, that's not important really.)
Mainly because this one was actually good.
I ordered your ebook and it's great, but i have a question that i couldn't find the answer to in there. This girl and I were getting really close. Everybody thought we were going to "hook up" soon. Then, some jerk hooked up with her. I still tried to get together with her even when they were going out. I know this guy was a jerk and i kept telling her that. Two years later, he dumps her and tells her that he cheated on her over 15 times. He also said that she "was just a rug for
him to walk on". She's completely done with him now, but there is still a problem....me and her still aren't together. I have a feeling that she kinda likes me, but we don't spend much time together. We faded from each other's lives a few months ago and I don't know how to get back into her life. While I think she might have some small feelings for me, she is probly going to be cautious because I've been waiting for her for two years. She's busy working a lot and I don't know how to get close to her. It's way to early to ask her on a date. How can i get close to her if she is being cautious (besides being funny of course, because i automatically do that)?
And also, every time a girl finds out that I'm a wrestler and I and do martial arts, they think that it automatically makes me "not their type". What do I say to that?
>>>MY COMMENTS:
To answer your second question first, just STOP TALKING ABOUT being a wrestler and martial artist.
This reminds me of the construction worker who goes to the doctor and says "Doc, every time I hit my finger with the hammer it really hurts. What should I do?".
STOP IT. Duh.
OK, now let's talk about your INTERESTING question.
Well you asked for it.
Your question was "How can I get close to her if she is being cautious...?".
Based on what you've told me in your email here, I'd say that maybe you should use your wrestling
and martial arts skills to BEAT HER UP a little.
Dude, what are you TALKING ABOUT?
lol...
By the way, I'm joking about beating her up. I don't usually tell people that I'm joking about things, but in this case you sound so dense that I have to.
Before I give you any more public verbal abuse, let me tell you something...
I'm doing this for your own good. You need it.
Back to the verbal abuse...
There is something that you're OBVIOUSLY not seeing here.
It's right in front of your face, but you're missing it.
In fact, there are TWO very important issues that we need to deal with.
Let's talk about the MOST OBVIOUS one first.
YOU'RE IN LOVE WITH DAMAGED GOODS... AND YOU CAN'T SEE IT.
Unfortunately, this is the GOOD news.
The BAD news is that you must have some major issues if this is the kind of woman that interests you.
As you can probably tell already, this isn't the kind of thing that I usually discuss in my newsletters... but I feel that this
particular discussion is going to help a lot of guys... so here goes.
I know, I know...
You're a "good guy".
You want to rescue her from the jerk, and show her how well you can treat her.
You think that if you could just have the chance to TELL HER how you FEEL ABOUT HER that she'd see the light, and come running to your arms... and you'd be able to give her everything she's always wanted in a man.
You want to be the one that leads her to understand that she DESERVES BETTER, and she can have it if she chooses you.
I feel ya, dog.
By the way, the only reason I know this particular situation so well is that I've LIVED IT a few too many times.
It's ironic, but you're actually LUCKY that this particular girl isn't interested in you.
You have no idea how much grief she's saving you by not being interested.
OK, back to the point...
Let's talk.
Just you and me.
Like friends.
WHAT ARE YOU THINKING, MAN?
It's always amazing to me how a guy will pass up a dozen opportunities a day to walk over and meet attractive women... but they'll spend days, weeks, months, or even YEARS trying to get the attention of a woman who isn't interested or
isn't WORTH it.
It's great being human, isn't it?
So why is this?
Why do us guys do this to ourselves?
What's up?
I mean, maybe this girl reminds you of your mom.
I don't think I want to go there.
Whatever it is, you really need to wake up and smell reality.
The last thing you want is a woman who is an ABUSE MAGNET.
I don't care what you say, or how nice you think she is... the reality of this situation is that you're hung up on a girl who needs more help than you can offer her.
And again, the WORST part of this situation is that you don't realize what this whole situation is saying about YOU.
You're basically admitting that you are:
1) Attracted to the wrong kinds of women.
2) Blind.
3) Obsessive.
(By the way, so am I, so don't feel too bad.)
So, what can a guy DO about a situation like this one?
Well, here are a few ideas:
1) Forget this particular girl. She's probably not interested in you to begin with, and even if she was, she's likely to break your heart and dump you for an abusive jerk (again) anyways.
2) Take a look at yourself, and figure out what you REALLY want. If you want abuse, neglect, and pain, hire a dominatrix. Less heartache.
3) Stop being so damn NICE. There's an incredible lesson here, but you're not seeing it. Guess why this girl chose the jerk over you? Hint: It was NOT because he was chasing her around and obsessing over her. It was because she felt ATTRACTION for him. He triggered something inside of her that is MORE POWERFUL than REASON. You need to learn how to do THAT, my man.
(and then he goes off in his whole spiel about attracting women, blah blah blah, that's not important really.)
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Date: 2003-07-17 12:15 pm (UTC)Bleah.
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