on flirting
Apr. 27th, 2003 07:54 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
lauralhBasically there are two approaches that men use to get women into bed:
1) Be completely honest verbally;
2) Lie about their intentions.
Neither of these is the best way of going about things. True, these approaches will work sometimes - some women will be suckered by (2), and some women will respect (1). But in my old age I find that the game is a little more interesting. I'm not saying one should play headgames or whatever when you date, I just mean flirting here. Flirting with someone is just infinitely superior. Because it IS honest, yet not completely banging one over the head with one's intentions. Plus it gets you worked up, something that simply saying "Nice shoes" etc doesn't do. I mean, maybe men can go from 0 to 60 in fifteen seconds, but then again maybe not. Anyway most women need a little bit more.
Which is why (2) works, lulling them into a false sense of security, then getting their guard down. But I know I personally resent it when guys do that. I respect (1) more, myself, but it's not nearly as much fun as playing. Also I think it's fine to announce your intentions if you've been flirting and still aren't quite sure, but until then it's sort of like, um, ok. Just take some initiative.
1) Be completely honest verbally;
2) Lie about their intentions.
Neither of these is the best way of going about things. True, these approaches will work sometimes - some women will be suckered by (2), and some women will respect (1). But in my old age I find that the game is a little more interesting. I'm not saying one should play headgames or whatever when you date, I just mean flirting here. Flirting with someone is just infinitely superior. Because it IS honest, yet not completely banging one over the head with one's intentions. Plus it gets you worked up, something that simply saying "Nice shoes" etc doesn't do. I mean, maybe men can go from 0 to 60 in fifteen seconds, but then again maybe not. Anyway most women need a little bit more.
Which is why (2) works, lulling them into a false sense of security, then getting their guard down. But I know I personally resent it when guys do that. I respect (1) more, myself, but it's not nearly as much fun as playing. Also I think it's fine to announce your intentions if you've been flirting and still aren't quite sure, but until then it's sort of like, um, ok. Just take some initiative.
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no subject
Date: 2003-04-27 09:44 pm (UTC)kinda.
(2) is more like doing all the pretty little circles and slight jumps and leaps, with the knowledge of the big bang at the end. as with the false sense of security, you don't know whether you'll land it, or do a lip skid across the ice.
no subject
Date: 2003-04-28 12:03 pm (UTC)I'm mainly thinking of the guys who claim they just want to be your friend, and who are all smiles and candy till things are consummated, at which point they reveal their true natures.
no subject
Date: 2003-04-28 11:06 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2003-04-28 11:59 am (UTC)Hence, I'm in the process of upgrading my radar systems.
Yay.