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[personal profile] lauralh
When I was a young lass I saw movies all the time, and if I wasn't allowed to see it, my mother would gladly tell me the entire plot. I "saw" scores of movies that way. I went to college and saw movies on my own, or rather with my roommate and friends. Four years of basically sometimes going to see bands, or clubbing, but mostly, just movies. We were film geeks.

And then when I graduated and still hung out with those kids in college, that was what we still did. Or I did it alone; I didn't care, and it was easier to sneak into the second-matinee that way. I saw at least two movies for four years of college and two years of living in Raleigh. And, hell, a year of living in Redmond. Movies really aren't a social activity, in my book; they're what you do when you're sitting at home alone (or with a bored roommate), or have a boring boyfriend, or film geek buddies. I mean there's nothing like watching a movie with film geeks and drinking eggnog or hot chocolate or wine (or a combination of those). But it's just a little antisocial, and that's not really what I'm like nowadays.

So instead of watching movies all the time, I go to clubs or bars and dance or talk to people. Steve and I will go to movies, or stay at home and watch them, but that's when we feel like being antisocial, really. Or like dorking out. We mainly only see movies at Cinerama, and most the time we have a lot of people with us, but you know. I rarely get the urge anymore to see films by myself, because I have "better" options.

Neither [livejournal.com profile] kamakhai nor I had seen it yet, and I'm kind of anti-hype, but when even [livejournal.com profile] jimbojones sees an indie film (he's not seen Ghost World or Donnie Darko) I can't be shown up. But it was a rather depressing film."Tears of a clown" indeed. Bill Murray has never made me feel so suicidal.

What really overtook me was the vast feeling of loneliness. Blah blah blah, alone in a city of millions. But yeah. Also I guess the fact that I'm not really going to be able to go back to Tokyo hit me pretty hard. I didn't really feel that the two had the connection that most people seemed to see; more like, the only thing they had in common was their sheer sense of loneliness, and they therefore forced themselves to be together. It wasn't a romance at all, although Charlotte thought it was.

I went home and looked at my photo album with the Japan photos, and I felt all better, though.
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Laural Hill

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