(no subject)

i was going to write something here but my stomach has started hurting terribly and I may need to go home.

this empty space

So we got to see a lot of people for a little bit of time yesterday, including rorotheclown, sarahbliss, and barbaloot. Had not seen these kids in ages, so it was nice to again. Also finally checked out Mr. Spot's Chai House, which is mmm mm good. Making some Morning Glory as we SPEAK. Or type. Or whatever it is you are doing yourself. Reg tried to get me to watch Revenge of the Nerds, and I saw the first 30 minutes till it was totally my bedtime.

Watched the first part, or rather chapter 4, of Angels in America, and started reading Middlesex which is frighteningly good so far. But I misplaced Aztec again and would kind of like to read a little more of it, as there are 400 more pages left. We are going to go to B&N later for mother's day Shopping, I believe.

winnars

from the "why did I stop drinking" poll:

Best Freaky Answer: das_prompt -- erotic dreams about Ann Coulter
Best Sexy Answer: discogravy -- giving it up in favor of another type of "stiff one"
Best GI JOE answer: asabass -- drinking is for losers and you're a WINNER
Best "you so didn't" answer: girlstyle -- it's just the hangover talking. you'll apologize to the liquor tomorrow.

ALL FOUR of you can have Mix CDs!
If you want.

The real reason is:
( Read more... )

Caring For Your Introvert

The habits and needs of a little-understood group

Do you know someone who needs hours alone every day? Who loves quiet conversations about feelings or ideas, and can give a dynamite presentation to a big audience, but seems awkward in groups and maladroit at small talk? Who has to be dragged to parties and then needs the rest of the day to recuperate? Who growls or scowls or grunts or winces when accosted with pleasantries by people who are just trying to be nice?

If so, do you tell this person [she] is "too serious," or ask if [she] is okay? Regard [her] as aloof, arrogant, rude? Redouble your efforts to draw [her] out?

If you answered yes to these questions, chances are that you have an introvert on your hands — and that you aren't caring for [her] properly. Science has learned a good deal in recent years about the habits and requirements of introverts. It has even learned, by means of brain scans, that introverts process information differently from other people (I am not making this up). If you are behind the curve on this important matter, be reassured that you are not alone. Introverts may be common, but they are also among the most misunderstood and aggrieved groups in America, possibly the world.
[...]
Are introverts oppressed? I would have to say so... With their endless appetite for talk and attention, extroverts also dominate social life, so they tend to set expectations. In our extrovertist society, being outgoing is considered normal and therefore desirable, a mark of happiness, confidence, leadership. Extroverts are seen as bighearted, vibrant, warm, empathic. "People person" is a compliment. Introverts are described with words like "guarded," "loner," "reserved," "taciturn," "self-contained," "private" — narrow, ungenerous words, words that suggest emotional parsimony and smallness of personality. Female introverts, I suspect, must suffer especially. [emph added] In certain circles, particularly in the Midwest, a man can still sometimes get away with being what they used to call a strong and silent type; introverted women, lacking that alternative, are even more likely than men to be perceived as timid, withdrawn, haughty.

How can I let the introvert in my life know that I support [her] and respect [her] choice? First, recognize that it's not a choice. It's not a lifestyle. It's an orientation.

Second, when you see an introvert lost in thought, don't say "What's the matter?" or "Are you all right?"

Third, don't say anything else, either.